Friday, October 2, 2009

At Heart, I'm Really Just a 12-Year-Old Boy

My fellow bitch, friends, and co-workers attended a fundraiser dinner last night, just to see precisely how DC we can be. The answer, for me, is not very.

The first speaker was conveying her experience as a child laborer in the agricultural industry. She reminisced, "I remember getting out of bed, lacing up my boots, grabbing my hoe..." I lost it. Seriously, I'm 12. I lost it and could not recover, because I managed to get a picture in my head of this little girl, dressed in the most outlandish pimp costume ever, grabbing her "ho" (affectionately named Candy by AO) and chiding her for being late.

Discussing my immature sense of humor with WHG led to further terrible euphemisms about ploughing, planting seeds and trimming bush. Which reminded me that I haven't publicly reacted with shock and horror to this commercial...



WHG: "I was horrified...obviously those plants should have completely disappeared."

Not to worry, ladies. The male version:



Hey gents, making it look taller doesn't change the way it feels, but it does cut down on the BJ flossing, sooo thanks Gillette?

5 comments:

  1. Thanks for commenting on the Schick Quattro commercial -- every time I see it, I'm totally appalled. :)

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  2. Razor ads are always a little uncomfortable. Either it's a woman shaving an already-shaved leg, or it's a man shaving his face and then promptly being assailed by hot women who'd like to find out just how close his shave is. But that Quattro ad is something else. So is this Venus ad, because I can't not see a vagina dentata in that razor, especially when they flex its sides... ewww.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=02DnCb_NuTQ

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  3. Leave it to you to find the most frightening foreign language razor ad. Now I too am relegated to seeing vagina dentata despite the commercial's fervent suggestion that I associate the razor with a butterfly (could two things be more incongruous?)

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  4. I am personally waiting to see a video for men showing how warm wax applied to hair, and then pulling it out by the roots, will make their tree look taller.

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  5. ...And doesn't prickle your partner! (pun intended)

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